If women are to defer to their husbands as a major way to show them respect, then women really are going to wind up silenced in every attempt at conversation, until the wives feel like they can only be heard if they yell and scream, or if they simply stop doing whatever it is that allows the husbands to take their wives for granted.Īnd “seducing their husbands” only gives the guys more of what they want, making their lives easier and better. Like, no more clean underwear as a trivial example, and, let’s be honest, lots less sex than he might like as a fairly serious one. If a wife wants her husband to notice something, she has to do, or, much more likely, NOT do, something that he then experiences as pain or inconvenience. They only notice discomfort and problems that happen to THEM. Maybe some men do, but too many men don’t. Yeah, that’s great in theory, but this expects men to notice things. Oy, just do everything to serve him and he’ll turn right around and do the same. So what should I do? Where can I turn to find mature believers? Jesus certainly experienced SO much more rejection. I genuinely feel alone like Job, Noah, and Elijah (when he was in the cave, feeling rejected). I am asking this question in light of your personal experience (as a family) – not being able to trust most leaders, backlash from “churches,” lack of Christ-like love, covering up and diminishing sin.
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I love that your family recently spoke about your year of church homelessness and Becca’s righteous indignation (LOVED IT!!!:) about the people in the pews being the ones to follow Christ, instead of the leaders. I certainly don’t aim for perfection in others, but do expect myself and all who call themselves followers of Jesus to take up our cross and die to self, demonstrating active love for others. It happens time and again, even though I’m trying to be gracious and hope for the best. I don’t attend church (though I’d love to feel like I am loved and belong!), as I’ve been to many different Evangelical churches (all different denominations) and have been completely discouraged by the terrible examples of Christ’s love I’ve witnessed. My parents were high-profile “Christians” and had every person fooled, on the outside.
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And I also haven’t been impressed with the selection of psychologists I’ve been to, either. However, I find myself TERRIFIED to trust any “Christian” who is also spiritually abusive.